you prefer to cause pain
so you don't feel it yourself
your words bite down
penetrating the skin I tried
to make thick, thicker
your venom seeps into
my veins deep, deeper

once an elixir sweeter than syrup
gasping for every last drop
now a poison I willingly drank
corroding, eroding, eating at my insides 
no antidote in sight

white knuckles grip a dull blade
you saw through heartstrings grown thin
across borders, over time
like a rubber band pulled taut
stretched, stretching, on the verge of breaking
snaps, snapping again and again
yet only one of us is left scathed...

...the one writing letters and poems
few sent, many idle
my pen knows your name too well
my ink runs dry, drier
an oasis now barren
cast in your silent shadow

burying hurt in anonymous bodies
I close my eyes and pretend it's you
fingers trace my spine, eyes fix on mine
you plead with me not to go
but you would, you did

a slow-burning match
quivering flame and splintering wood
charring pinched fingertips.
a black cloud drowning my lungs
smoking, choking, struggling to breathe

you left me speaking in tongues
similes and metaphors and analogies
clinging to cliches to make sense of it all
there's comfort in knowing others have hurt like this before
how many others have you hurt like this before?

Do you remember what it felt like?
With all the time that's passed,
lyrics stuck in your head,
you can't quite recall the tune.

The heartbeat of memory
grown weary with age,
but you still hear the faint whisper
of your language once fluent.

Shadows slowly shroud your history
abstracting the warm embrace,
obscuring a distant reality,
no longer yours to live.

A narrative without protagonist,
how far removed you've become
as the pages go on turning,
have you forgotten how to remember?